剑桥雅思11出版时间虽不长,同学们争先恐后做题的热情却十分高涨。作为备考雅思最新的教材,剑11的确有很多内容预示着雅思考试的新趋势。新的剑11中,雅思写作部分沿袭剑4-10,只给出大小各四篇文章。对于这仅有的雅思新题,备考雅思的同学更应深度分析,练习写作。
下面是由新东方吉林学校陈思佳老师带来的剑桥雅思11写作分析,同学们学习范文写作思路。
Task1 小作文
The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
导语:
剑桥雅思小作文有史以来第一次出现6个饼对比的图,无疑对于整理信息和组织信息的难度加大。而该篇文章官方只给出了4.5分的参考范文,大部分烤鸭都没有办法把它充分利用起来。所以今天老师带领大家重新解析并完成该篇作文题目的全文写作过程。
思路分析:
(1) 切入点:
6个饼6个地区,3个方面的用水情况。按照3个方面来描述会更容易一些。它们分别是工业用水,农业用水和家庭用水。
(2) overview概述:对于北美和欧洲这两个发达国家集中的地区来说,3个部分的用水量分布模式相似。而其他四个欠发达地区总体模式差别不大。
(3) 细节一:
发达地区包括北美和欧洲,工业用水量都是占主导地位,约占总用水量的一半左右(分别是48%和53%),而紧随其后的都是农业用水,差不多占1/3的比重。相比之下,家庭用水量在这两个地区是最少的,只有13%和15%,但是这个比重也远远高出其他4个地区。
(4) 细节二:
显然,欠发达地区利用更多的水资源在农业方面,这个比重高达80%多,最少的也有71%(在南美洲)而最多的已经快占到90%的比重了。因此可想而知,其他两个方面的用水量的比重一定是比较小的。其中非洲,中亚和东南亚家庭用水量不超过总量的10%,而这些地区的工业用水量更少5%~7%,最高也就只有12%。相比之下南美在家庭用水方面还算比较多的地区,差不多20%的水资源用于人民生活,这个数据的一半被用于该地区的工业生产。
(5) 总结:
可见,发达地区的水资源更多地分配到经济类产品方面,包括工业和农业,而欠发达地区只在农业方面消耗相当大比重的淡水。
文章结构:
第一段——改写题目
第二段——(2)概述
第三段——(3)细节一
第四段——(4)细节二
第五段——(5)总结
参考范文:
The given six pie charts totally illustrate the using proportion of water for three different aspects in six regions worldwide.
Generally in the relatively developed continents including North America and the Europe, the pattern of water-usage distribution shares great similarity, whereas other four underdeveloped regions indicates another type of smaller gaps.
To be more specific, the water utilization of industry is both dominant in the two flourishing territory,approximately half of the whole (48% versus 53%), followed by that of agriculture, which take up marginally more than one-third of the total. In correspondence, the using percentage of water resource for residents is the least, with only 13% and 15% respectively, which still largely exceed the figures for the other four regions.
Apparently, the developing areas invest far more water in agriculture, each having around 80%, and even the least, the figure for South America still constitute 71% while the largest number even reach nearly 90%. Thereby it is obvious that the use of other two respects is bound to be less: no more than 10% domestic use in Central Asia and Southeast Asia. These areas even use less water in industry (merely 5%~7%, with the highest percentage12%). By contrast, people in South America utilize a higher proportion of water in domestic aspect, almost 20%, half of which is used in industrial part of the region.
Overall, the water resource of developed areas is distributed more in economic products involving industry and agriculture, while developing ones only consume a considerable number of water in agriculture.
(255 words)
WRITING TASK 2
Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
思路分析:
政府:政府的职责是为人民服务,规划和实施城市建设
公路:主要是私人交通工具和中小型公共交通工具使用
铁路:运载量大,几乎不会造成拥堵;但是修建成本较高,工程量大
ps:汉语思路:
高质量的英文写作包括三个方面:内容,逻辑和语言。所以组织好写作内容是写好作文的第一步。
而语言才是第二步,有了好的内容,我们才能知道自己那些语言能力不足:词汇量小或者语法结构单一。那么究竟如何写出好的作文内容呢?答案就在上面的思路分析中,即对于名词概念的本质进行深度挖掘,并从中找到逻辑联系,之后再完成作文的时候就会行云流水。
汉语范文:
也许是交通问题已经困扰世界各国人民太久了,所以各国政府都纷纷在交通建设和改善方面做出了不小的努力。但是对于政府花钱建设更多的铁路而不是公路这样的观点,我本人表示不能完全赞成。
首先不得不承认,建设铁路某种程度上是一件利国利民的事情。毕竟与其他运输方式相比,铁路运输的单位时间内运载量是最大的,也是陆运速度最快的一种方式,同时由于铁路运输是依靠强大的运作系统来控制运行的,所以铁路运输几乎不会产生交通拥堵的问题。
但是,不管是铁路建设还是公路建设应该取决于很多综合因素,比如城市发展规模,人口流动幅度,地址环境情况等等。对于世界级大都市来说,显然公路和铁路都扮演中同样重要的角色,一方面大城市要接纳来自全国各地甚至世界各地的人口,所以在铁路方面一定要提供足够的便利。同时在这样的大城市生活的人,在日常出行方面也应该有一定的保障,所以公路建设也必不可少。相反,对于中等发达城市来说,具体情况也应该具体分析,如果地理条件和资金条件都允许的情况下, 建设铁路并不是坏事,反而能给当地带来更多的发展机会。但是如果是规模比较小的城市,过多建设铁路显然意义并不大,毕竟外来人口不多,或者人口流动密度不大。
此外,人们似乎忽视了铁路运输在带来便利的同时,也意味着更高的投资成本和更多的资源投入和更复杂的运行系统的建立,这些都需要花费相当多的时间和财政预算。在铁路建设过程中难免会造成更为严重的交通问题,除非政府能比较合理地规避这些潜在问题,否则盲目修建铁路绝对不是明智之选。
总而言之,到底是建铁路还是建公路不能武断地做决定。城市发展必然尤其自身发展规律,只要政府的基础设施建设是符合规律发展趋势的,那势必会满足人们生活需求带来预想的好处。相反,违反了规律也许会得到适得其反的效果。
英语范文:
也许是交通问题已经困扰世界各国人民太久了,所以各国政府都纷纷在交通建设和改善方面做出了不小的努力。但是对于政府花钱建设更多的铁路而不是公路这样的观点,我本人表示不能完全赞成。
It is perhaps the long-disturbing traffic issue that drives governments all over the globe to make great efforts in establishing or improving their traffic system. Nevertheless, I still cannot be enrolled in the camp that claims it is wise to construct railway rather than roads. (45 words)
首先不得不承认,建设铁路某种程度上是一件利国利民的事情。毕竟与其他运输方式相比,铁路运输的单位时间内运载量是最大的,也是陆运速度最快的一种方式,同时由于铁路运输是依靠强大的运作系统来控制运行的,所以铁路运输几乎不会产生交通拥堵的问题。显然事实铁路建设是件有益的事情。
Undoubtedly, the railway construction, in a way, can be deemed as a win-win program for both the country and its citizens. After all, compared with other types of transportation, the transporting load of railage in a unit time is the largest and it is also the fastest approach of conveyance on land. Simultaneously, due to its strikingly strong operating system in running, it can scarcely entail any congestion. Evidently, it is advantageous to implement the plan referred to railway establishment. (80 words)
但是,不管是铁路建设还是公路建设应该取决于很多综合因素,比如城市发展规模,人口流动幅度,地址环境情况等等。对于世界级大都市来说,显然公路和铁路都扮演中同样重要的角色,一方面大城市要接纳来自全国各地甚至世界各地的人口,所以在铁路方面一定要提供足够的便利。同时在这样的大城市生活的人,在日常出行方面也应该有一定的保障,所以公路建设也必不可少。相反,对于中等发达城市来说,具体情况也应该具体分析,如果地理条件和资金条件都允许的情况下, 建设铁路并不是坏事,反而能给当地带来更多的发展机会。但是如果是规模比较小的城市,过多建设铁路显然意义并不大,毕竟外来人口不多,或者人口流动密度不大。
Rather, whether it is the rail or the road, the erection is in requirement of many other comprehensive elements, for example the scale of city development, the extent of population mobility, the condition of geographical surroundings and so forth. For those world-famous metropolis, like New York or Shanghai, both railroad and traffic-way are key in the city function. For one thing, major cities need to receive populations nationwide and even worldwide; thereby, sufficient convenience must be provided by perfect train system. Meanwhile, residents living in such a big city are supposed to be ensure with a relatively pleasant road-travel condition. However, for those middle-sized cities or towns,situations should differ according to different complex consideration. With the help of proper geography and adequate budgets, building railway should not be a malfeasance. Instead, it tends to introduce numerous opportunities for further development. Unfortunately, it seems not make sense for cities of limited scale to set up extensive railway, where, there are neither too much immigrating population nor too large population density after all. (173 words)
此外,人们似乎忽视了铁路运输在带来便利的同时,也意味着更高的投资成本和更多的资源投入和更复杂的运行系统的建立,这些都需要花费相当多的时间和财政预算。在铁路建设过程中难免会造成更为严重的交通问题,除非政府能比较合理地规避这些潜在问题,否则盲目修建铁路绝对不是明智之选。
Additionally, do forget that along with the above sweeteners, rail service signifies a higher financial investment, a larger amount of resources as well as a much more complicated running system, all of which require a considerable number of time and budget. Besides, during the construction process, more severe traffic congestion is inevitable, unless the authorities can avoid these visible or potential issues and otherwise a blind construction of railway cannot be a wise choice. (74 words)
总而言之,到底是建铁路还是建公路不能武断地做决定,还是应该顺应城市发展规律。
Overall, decision of whether to build should not be arbitrary, while it must be in accordance with laws of civil development. (21 words)
(393 words)
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作者简介:
陈思佳,新东方吉林学校高级讲师,哈尔滨师范大学英语系优秀毕业生,持有专业八级证书。擅长分析学生心理,激发学生学习兴趣。从业5年,以轻松、直观的教学方式树立了良好的口碑。
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