10条法则帮你认清身边的“毒瘤”:珍爱生命,远离toxic people
新东方网2021-12-28 17:55朱博
作家Rania Naim曾写过一篇文章叫做Toxic People: 10 Things They Do That Suck The Life Out Of You. 里面提到了“毒瘤”们10种让人窒息的行为。内容简洁明了,极具生活指导价值;语言用词精准地道,完全可以作为我们英文学习者参考的语料素材。下面我们就来看看Rania提到了哪些“恶行”:
1. They don’t listen to you. They’re only interested in getting their point across and being heard so they never truly listen to what you have to say even if it’s urgent or important. 毒瘤们对别人的发言充耳不闻,无论事情多重要,只顾表达自己的想法。
get across (to somebody) / get something across (to somebody) = to be communicated or understood; to succeed in communicating something. 清楚表达观点以完成沟通,例如:
Your meaning didn’t really get across.
He’s not very good at getting his ideas across.
2. They think they’re better than you. Toxic people have a way of making you feel like you’ll never be as good as they are. They continue to say or do things that make you feel small or inadequate just so they can feel better about themselves. 毒瘤总有那么一套方法让你感觉自己渺小微不足道,并以此获得自我感觉良好。
have a way of doing something = used to say that something often happens in a particular way, especially when it is out of your control; to often have a characteristic or to frequently do something. 经常做某事、具备某种特点,例如:
First love affairs have a way of not working out.
Life has a way of surprising us now and then.
3. They don’t respect you. They discount your opinion and your point of view. They don’t try to support your decisions or your dreams. They have double standards and they don’t let you get away with things they normally get away with because they feel entitled to do so. They often deem themselves more respectable than you. 毒瘤有自己的一套双标法则,自己可以放火但不准别人点灯,对人毫无尊重。
get away with (doing) something = to do something wrong and not be punished for it or to receive a relatively light punishment. 做错事情却免受惩罚,例如:
Don’t be tempted to cheat—you’ll never get away with it.
Nobody gets away with insulting me like that.
4. They’re manipulative. Toxic people are really skilled when it comes to making you feel guilty for things you didn’t do or twisting your words and your actions to make you look like the bad guy or accuse you of something you didn’t do. They know how to make it sound like you’re the delusional one. 他们很会精神控制,通过曲解你的言论或行为让你看起来是个坏人,他们会无端的指责你,让你感到愧疚甚至产生妄想。
when it comes to something / to doing something = when it is a question of something当谈及到…时,例如:
When it comes to getting things done, he’s useless.
5. There’s no winning with them. Once they make up their mind about something, you can’t really convince them otherwise. They’ll never put themselves in your shoes or try to understand where you’re coming from because they lack empathy and they don’t care about what anyone thinks as long as they’re satisfied. 他们不会设身处地的替别人着想,他们只在乎自己是否满意。
put be in somebody’s shoes / put yourself in somebody’s shoes = to be in, or imagine that you are in, another person’s situation, especially when it is an unpleasant or difficult one. 设身处地的站在他人立场上思考问题,例如:
I wouldn’t like to be in your shoes when they find out about it.
What would you do? Just put yourself in my shoes.
where somebody is coming from = somebody’s ideas, beliefs, personality, etc. that makes them say what they have said 驱使某人说某种话背后的想法或性格特点,例如:
I see where you’re coming from (= I understand what you mean).
6. They’re very selfish and self-absorbed. Toxic people think the world revolves around them, so everything is either about them or it’s not important. Once they feel like someone else is getting more attention, they’ll make a scene or cause a commotion just to revert the attention back to them. 他们极度自我为中心,认为世界就是绕着他们转的,不允许任何人抢走自己的风头。
revolve around / round somebody / something = to have somebody / something as the main interest or subject 以某人或某物为中心、重点,例如:
His whole life revolves around surfing.
She thinks that the world revolves around her.
The discussion revolved around the question of changing the club’s name.
7. They don’t celebrate with you. They remember your failures and your losses very well but they never celebrate your accomplishments with you. They find more joy in your setbacks than your comebacks. 他们清楚的记得你的失败但是却从不庆贺你取得的成就。看到你受挫让他们更开心。
comeback = if a person in public life makes a comeback, they start doing something again which they had stopped doing, or they become popular again 华丽回归,重新流行,例如:
an ageing pop star trying to stage a comeback
8. They play the victim. When toxic people are cornered, or proven wrong, they’ll often play the victim and start blaming others for their mistakes or their loss of temper because they’re never wrong. It’s always someone else’s fault. 他们不会承认自己有错,在他们眼里错的永远是别人,他们总是扮演受害者角色。
9. They don’t bring out the best in you. When you’re around them, you’re different, you can’t be yourself because they will always provoke you or find ways to bring you down, so you either have to be very careful with what you say or stay quiet because they only hear themselves anyway. 他们不会激发出你最好的一面,反而会经常打压你,在他们身边你无法做自己。
bring out the best in somebody = to make somebody exhibit the best traits, 使某人最棒的特质显现,例如:
Sometimes it takes a crisis to bring out the best in people.
Mrs. Smith must bring out the best in her students—they all get good grades in her class
bring down = to cause the failure or defeat of someone or something or to make someone sad or worsen their mood. 使失败或沮丧,例如:
I don’t feel like going out tonight—learning that I didn’t get the job really brought me down.
The rebels are determined to bring down the government.
10. You’re happier without them. Do they suck the energy out of you? Do they ruin your day? Do they make your life more difficult? These are all signs that these people are not a good fit for you or your life and they don’t contribute to your happiness or your growth. They only bring pain and drama. 你的生活里没有他们你会更快乐!他们榨干你的能量,毁掉你美丽的一天,他们对你的成长和快乐毫无贡献,他们只会给你带来痛苦和事端。
Eliminating the toxic people in your life will not only make your life better, it will also make you discover more great things about yourself that you subconsciously buried to keep these toxic people happy. 离开那些毒瘤吧!以前那些你下意识里为了取悦他们而隐藏起来的优点都会显现出来!你的生活会变得更好!
It all starts with realizing who the toxic people in your life are and what kind of influence they have on you then you can start setting boundaries and protecting yourself from their poisonous energy that sucks the life out of you. 认清你身边的毒瘤以及他们带来的消极影响,划清界限保护自己!
suck the life out of / suck somebody dry = to remove all useful, valuable qualities or possessions from a person, thing, or place,例如:
That firm sucks its new programmers dry after five years and then fires them.
Out-of-town stores have sucked the life out of the city center.
珍爱生命,远离toxic people!
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